A byte of humour . . .

LAPTOP: Where the cat sleeps.

Have you ever noticed:

Laptops are usually/often sat on top of desks.

Desktops are usually/often sat underneath desks. (Unless you have a fancy one that you want to show off).

Maybe we should revive an old slang word that has fallen out of general use and call them guzunders?

I think this one was meant to poke fun at the Texans, after their little power interruption.

Q:  How many IT staff does it take to change a lightbulb at Kyle Field?

A:  Five

One to re-route a shipment of arc lamps from Michigan Stadium.
One to install a twelve ton cooling system.
One to re-route high voltage lines from Mexico.
One to re-wire the stadium with 1500kcmil wire.
One to unscrew the old lightbulb.

Cheers!

Naught

Going through some old drives and found this one.

Wife texts husband on a really cold morning:  "Windows frozen, won't open!"

Husband texts back:  "Pour warm water over it and gently tap edges with a hammer."

Five minuets later wife texts back:  "Computer really messed up now."

Cheers!

Naught.

Edited by Naught McNoone, 20 September 2023 - 06:44 PM.

 

MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the barbie.

When I was in school . . .

Memory was something you lost with age.

A mouse was the reason you got a cat.

A hard drive was a long trip on a windy day in winter.

A cursor was someone who used rude language.

A keyboard was used to play the piano.

A screen was used to keep flies out.

A router was used to make decorative patterns in wood.

An application was used to get a job.

A program was something you watched on television

.

A web was something a spider used to trap flies

.

A virus was something that gave you influenza.

Windows were used to let light and fresh air into the house.

A menu was something you read in a restaurant.

Cookies were kept in a jar at Grandma's house.

A pin was used by a tailor or seamstress.

A tree was part of a forest.

A root was part of a plant.

A directory was a book in a phone booth.

Home was where you went to get your laundry done, on school holidays.

Cheers!

Naught

Lots of good ones, eveybody!  But this one...

Home was where you went to get your laundry done, on school holidays.

Q:  What type of RAM do they use in Idaho?

 

 

A:  Potato Chips.

 

Wait what?  I don't get this joke.  Could you explain?

JK: Where do you stay? If you are not a Scot, for "Stay" read "Live"

And the joke -  About the only thing that grows in Idaho is potatoes, they're famous for them

Edited by wee-eddie, 12 October 2023 - 01:44 PM.

JK: Where do you stay? If you are not a Scot, for "Stay" read "Live"

 

And the joke -  About the only thing that grows in Idaho is potatoes, they're famous for them

I see, thanks for explaining eddie.